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Rock of Ages (2012)

Rock of Ages (2012)


Rock of Ages Poster

Directed By:  Adam Shankman
Written By:  Justin Theroux, Chris D’Arienzo, Alan Loeb,
Starring: Julianne Hough, Diego Boneta, Alec Baldwin, Russel Brand, Paul Giamatti, Tom Cruise, Malin Akerman
Reviewed By: Adam Griffith
Method Viewed:  HBO Go


Rock of Ages, much like hair metal music in the 80’s is a semi-hard, rocking, stupid, good time.  There I said it.  Honestly, I was thinking I was gonna hate this Musical turned film, but in the end it was much better than I anticipated.  The plot of this film is fairly basic.  A ditzy blonde who likes to sing Sherrie (Julianne Hough) arrives in Los Angeles hoping to become a star.  Of course Sherrie  gets robbed within minutes of her arrival.  As expected a hero/barback/aspiring musician comes to her aid, say hi to Drew (Diego Boneta).  Drew manages to convince his boss Dennis Dupree (Alec Baldwin) to give Sherrie a job at the Bourbon Room on Sunset Strip.

Rock of Ages Screenshot 1


As expected our star crossed lovers develop some issues and fall in and out of love.  Will they Drew and Sherrie end up together in the end after all of their trials and tribulations?  Come on now I don’t even have to tell you the answer to that question.  Lots of sub plots going on in this twisted (sister) tale.  Sorry I could not resist throwing that in there.  The Bourbon Room has not been paying its taxes.  A right-wing politician Patricia Whitmore (Catherine  Zeta-Jones) wants to close the place down as it is ruining young kids minds, with raunchy rock n roll music.


Rock of Ages Screenshot 2

Enter Tom Cruise, I mean Stacee Jaxx and his sleazy manager Paul Gill (Paul Giamatti).  Now I am not the biggest Tom Cruise fan, lets face it, dude is one freaky midget.  However, he really brings his A game with this performance as a stoned out, self absorbed, leather pants wearing rocker.  He steals every scene that he is in, with this memorable performance.  Anyhow Jaxx agrees to play a show at the Bourbon Room where he got his start back in the day.  Big shocker things don’t go as planned.  Man this script will really keep you guessing.


Rock of Ages Screenshot 3


Did I mention that Stacee Jaxx has a monkey in his entourage?  I can’t lie I F’ing love me some monkeys.  Now this is no run of the mill pet monkey.  This furry little dude is named Hey Man and he not only wears various costumes but he can also tend bar.  How great is that?  Unfortunately, even after watching Hey Man in this film, my wife is still adamant that I cannot get a pet monkey.


Rock of Ages


Terribly predictable plot aside this film is still quite entertaining.  Is it a good film?  No I can’t honestly say this is a good movie.  However, it is worth watching.  What makes this film palatable is the great cheesy hair metal soundtrack.  Those viewers of a certain age will most assuredly enjoy this portion of the film.  The film includes hits by such acts as Sister Christiain, Def Leppard, Poison, Journey and many many more.  You are probably gonna end up singing along with this ludicrous soundtrack of spandex quasi-metal.



Rock of Ages Screenshot 7

Hey Man make mine a double please.


Rock of Ages Screenshot 8

This is the sort of film where if you just relax and don’t think too hard you are probably gonna have a good time.  Sort of like the 1980’s in general.  I should mention that the stars of the film are actually the ones singing all the hits that you used to listen to when you were wearing acid washed jeans and driving around in your mom’s fireo. I ended up enjoying this film way more than I thought I would, it is a nice trip down memory lane for those of that generation. For those not of the 1980’s this is a good opportunity to laugh at those who were.  I am giving this film two Hey Man’s cause he is the coolest monkey around.

rate two




Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Dan O. August 17, 2013, 2:47 pm

    Good review Adam. A dull musical, but it still had me tapping my feet more than a few times.

    • Adam August 17, 2013, 7:58 pm

      Dan this film is certainly not breaking any new ground and if was all original songs I would probably hate this movie.

  • Steven Flores August 17, 2013, 2:52 pm

    I fucking hated this film. It reminded me of why I don’t like 80s rock music. It’s so cheesy although I will rather listen to that than the crap rock music that’s played on the radio. The story was terrible and the acting from Julianne Hough and Diego Boneta is horrible that is amped up by their singing which is even worse. Catherine Zeta-Jones looked stiff throughout the film while that duet with Russell Brand and Alec Baldwin was just cringe-worthy. The only thing in that film that kept it from being a total disaster is Tom Cruise who really went all out for the role as he and his money were awesome. That’s pretty much it. The next time I hear Julianne Hough sing, I’m going to punch her fucking throat just so she can shut the fuck up.

    • Adam August 17, 2013, 8:07 pm

      Steven, I really can’t argue with any point that you brought up and I would love to see you punch Julianne Hough in the suck hole.

      It’s not so much that this is good music in fact the majority of this stuff is not the sort of music I was into at the time. However, there was no escaping this sort of rock at the time it was everywhere.

  • Chris August 17, 2013, 3:44 pm

    Glad you liked this one! I really had a whole lot of fun with it myself, and thought a lot of the hate was really unwarranted. Some people just can’t appreciate good cheese, I suppose.

    And Tom Cruise was awesome!

    • Adam August 17, 2013, 8:09 pm

      Tom Cruise was awesome in this one Chris. He really went all in. I sort of viewed this as a goofy cheesy comedy. I am pretty surprised this is not having a live run in Vegas right now.

  • Angie August 17, 2013, 4:52 pm

    I liked this movie… I mean I love the broadway show and enjoy going to it! So I had to see this movie. It’s not like something I would watch all the time. I love Tom Cruise as an actor. He always is really good in his roles and this one he did excellent!!!

    • Adam August 17, 2013, 8:10 pm

      Hey Angie thanks for stopping by and commenting. You know I am not a big Broadway guy but I would totally check this out. I bet it sounded a lot better with professional singers.

  • Nick August 17, 2013, 7:36 pm

    Easy to understand your review, Adam, even though I hated it. Tom Cruise made it only slightly watchable, but Julianne “I Cannot Act but I’m Pretty” Hough-Seacrest can go blow a big one.

    • Adam August 17, 2013, 8:12 pm

      Nick I can totally see folks hating this film. Hell I expected to hate this film.

      Hey what about Hey Man, didn’t you like the monkey?

  • Tyson Carter August 18, 2013, 2:39 am

    I also f’ing love me some monkeys. If we buy each other one, our wives cant get mad surely, if its a gift? :)

    • Adam August 18, 2013, 10:40 am

      Tyson I mentioned your brilliant idea to my eight and half month pregnant wife and she threatened to stab you if we sent each other monkeys :-(

      • Tyson Carter August 19, 2013, 4:14 am

        Im about to become a first time dad in less than 3 months, surely she would forgive us once, just for a simple gift exchange? ;)

        • Adam August 19, 2013, 10:36 am

          Maybe if we could train the monkeys to change diapers. ;-)

  • Grace August 18, 2013, 10:14 am

    I loved this film. But then again I do love cheesy musicals. Tom Cruise, I thought, was brilliant, though the two leads were a bit, well, rubbish. Still, even having been born in ’89, thanks to my older brothers I grew up to love this sort of music, so I was always going to like it.

    • Adam August 18, 2013, 10:44 am

      Hey Grace thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I think I prefer my musicals with extra cheese rather than something depressing and overly earnest. Older brothers in the 80’s no way you can escape knowing all these songs ;-)

  • Mark Walker August 18, 2013, 11:34 am

    I’m that keen on this one, man but ill give it a go just to see what Cruise brings to the table. I keep hearing how good he is here.

    • Adam August 18, 2013, 1:35 pm

      It’s a goofy good time, but Cruise is pretty impressive.

  • ruth August 18, 2013, 12:02 pm

    I remember being intrigued by this when I saw the trailer, I mean I grew up w/ these rock ballads from Guns ‘n Roses, Warrant, Poison etc. so I thought it’d be fun. I still haven’t got around to it but I might rent it eventually. Cruise looks like he’s having fun w/ this role too!

    • Adam August 18, 2013, 1:36 pm

      Ruth I watched it on HBO Go if you have that I think it is still on there. It has plenty of cheesy 80’s ballads.

  • Dan August 18, 2013, 12:03 pm

    Apart from an early moment when Catherine Zeta-Jones-(Douglas) dances around a church with a group of attractive ladies I thought Rock of Ages was one dull bore the entire way through. In fact, thankfully, I was watching on TV and could fast-forward most of the second half. The music was there but it didn’t have the heart of Mamma Mia.

    • Adam August 18, 2013, 1:38 pm

      Dan I am not much of a musical guy, well other than Hudson Hawk, Grease and the Sound of Music. I actually thought this one was pretty funny. But I can see why folks would dislike it. Not much in the way of acting other than Cruise and the story was nothing if not predictable.

  • ckckred August 19, 2013, 9:51 am

    Nice review. A friend gave me this on DVD a while back but I haven’t watched it yet. I didn’t know Justin Theroux wrote this.

    • Adam August 19, 2013, 10:37 am

      Love your new Gravatar image Ckckred. Yeah it is worth a watch but pretty much only if you are into or familiar with cheeseball 80’s “rock”.

  • Evan Crean August 21, 2013, 4:51 am

    I really love the ’80s on the level of VH1’s I Love the ’80s, but even I couldn’t get into this film. Hearing some of my favorite rock ballads was great, although I thought most of them were worked into the story in the stereotypically stupid ways most musicals do when they’re made up of preexisting songs. The worst part for me was Tom Cruise and not because of his singing. He dressed the part of Stacy Jaxx and talked the part, however his performance was totally robotic. There was just nothing real or passionate about it to me. My favorite characters were the ones played by Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand. They saved the movie for me.

  • Joe Sikes August 26, 2013, 6:30 pm

    I had high hopes for this one, Adam but I couldn’t make it through the first twenty minutes. Maybe my hopes were too high and I wasn’t high enough:) May have to give it a watch after a few extra adult beverages and sporting a red fishnet tank top.

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